Marriage vs. Divorce

            Over the years, we have seen the number of divorces rise significantly. We all know someone who got divorced in the early years of marriage. Some reasons for divorce maybe be difficulties in the early years of marriage, problems with spouse, unhappiness, etc. These reasons are often the main reason for people to get divorced, and it makes me wonder why we have so many couples that are getting divorced instead of finding solutions for their problems. I will be discussing three topics which are: romanticizing marriage, problems with spouse, and happiness in marriage. I believe that these topics have a great impact when someone is deciding to get divorced.

            First, I would like to talk about romanticizing marriage. Marriage is not a fairytale. It will have its happy moments as well as difficult times. I know that social media plays a huge role in romanticizing marriage. In social media, we see these perfect marriages that seems like they do not have any problem at all, but that is not true. All marriages have difficulties. We should not compare our marriage with the ones we see on social media because they do not share their reality, only the best moments.

Another aspect of romanticizing marriage is not being resilient. Many people do not persevere when difficulties are present in their marriage. People may think, “I got married to be happy, why is it so difficult?” There is not an easy solution to problems, and divorce is not the solution. When a couple faces difficult times together, they become closer and the foundation of their marriage is stronger than it was before. During hardships, it is time to be resilient and be there for each other. We will face opposition in all things and that is part of life and marriage.

Second, there will be times when you face problems with our spouses, and that is okey because you and your spouse are different people with different backgrounds. People may think “I am having problems with my spouse, maybe I married the wrong person. This person is not the love of my life.” These thoughts are not true. Like I said before, people are different, and they have different struggles and shortcomings, but those things do not make that individual the wrong person for someone. People must be willing to forgive, understand, help and move on. Once my mother said something to me about marriage that I found to be true, “If there was no room for mistakes, no one would be married.” Remember you should treat your spouse the way you would like to be treated.

            Last, over time married people tend to think, “I should be happy, but I am not. It is not fun like we thought it would be.” Sometimes this can happen in marriage, but let me tell you this, fun only depends on you and your spouse. For example, my husband and I do not have money to do many things that we would like to, but we do not let those things get on our way of our happiness. We always find things that do not cost us much money. The fun moments in your marriage do not depend on your bank account, places, or circumstances. It only depends on how open you are to finding joy on the journey. Remember if you are not happy about something talk to your spouse about it. The happiest and funniest moments in marriage so far are the ones we did plan for, and they only happened because we were willing to find joy in our marriage.